Elliot: What about that one?
Me: I don’t know…doesn’t he look a bit geriatric?
E: Oh, you’re right, though. He has gout.
Marcus: And some of his spike are fall out.
E: He obviously has cataracts, too, and it looks like those teeth might be dentures.
M: And he is have belly-pot and miss arm. Maybe he is have dia-beets.
M: That is what I am say!
Me: You guys, this is far too sad. We can’t bring Dino Drop back with the saddest of entries. I’m just thinking about how he lives alone in a tiny little apartment that violates all sorts of health and safety codes. And how he probably lost his arm in a war, and now people just look at him strangely because he only has one arm, but he just wants to be loved and respected again. His wife is dead.
E: First of all…holy shit. And second, you’re only on that track because you just watched that painful episode of Call the Midwife.
Me: Oh my god that episode…
E: No! Don’t think about it again! Rerouting, rerouting, happier thoughts, new plans for this dino.
M: Maybe is just disguise. Like, he is just look old, so he is lure enemy close. And then he is be like SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKER. And then kill and eat.
Me: I actually like that scenario better. I’m not sure what that says about me.
E: It says you’ve been spending a great deal of time around Marc. Also, Marc, you’re not supposed to be swearing, remember?
M: SURPRISE MOTHERFLOWER.
E: Not even you can make that sound fearsome.
M: Yeaaaah, weeeell, flower you.
Me: How long are you going to make him keep saying that?
E: Until Mira stops thinking that it’s alright to drop the F-bomb in art class, I should think.
M: Uuuuuugh, she is never stop think that because is best. word. You are say like all of time!
E: Not in front of the kiddos, buddy boy.
M: Non. We are non buddy. I am kill and eat. I am wear old man costume and then you are come to check on, and I am turn you into pot roast.
E: That’s what you would turn me into?
E: I don’t know, I guess I thought you would at least have the decency to turn me on a spit and dance around or something.
Me: What, have you thought about this? You’ve thought about how you would want Marc to cannibalize you? That is messed up.
E: Well, how would you prefer to be eaten?
Me: By an alligator.
E: See? You’ve thought about it.
Me: That’s totally different. I’m not planning for Marc to cannibalize me as though it’s some kind of eventuality. Man, we are way off track. What else about this dinosaur?
M: Weeeelll, I am like that his say RAWR. But should be all capital letter, I am think. I am non sure what “Rawr” is sound like. I guess is noise dinosaur is make when he is like…answer phone or settle on TV channel or maybe do good job parallel park. What? What is so funny?
E: You! Settle on a TV channel, hahaha.
M: Whatever! Whenever we are manage to agree on what to watch, you are always say something like “finally” or “quite” or “thank god.” Dinosaur would be like, *sigh* “…Rawr.”
E: No, it makes perfect sense. I just love that you generated that exact list of possibilities.
Me: I love the idea of dinosaurs doing normal everyday things.
E: You’ve always liked that–strange things doing everyday things.
Me: Absolutely. I really should spend more time in costume just wandering around going grocery shopping, mailing bills, and riding the L. Scratch that last one, you see costumed people on the L all the time. Maybe holding office hours in costume.
M: You are already do.
Me: Yeah, but it was Halloween. I mean like, for no reason. Oh hey, it’s May 18th, I think I’ll just wear this mask and hit up Trader Joes. That sounded wrong.
Me: I meant wear a costume mask and go to the store!
Me: E! You know what I mean!
Me: Whatever, dickjerk. I do wonder, though, why is a dinosaur who only softly “Rawrs” a killer?
M: Is part of costume.
E: Or! Or it could be part of his psychopathy. He’s a soft-spoken sort of fellow, so you don’t even notice that he’s about to flip out and attack you.
Me: Ok, now who’s a creep?
E: Um, you are the only reason I know anything about psychopaths. I’m not the one writing a dissertation on mental institutions and desperately trying to find something to replace the Dexter-shaped void in my life.
Me: I had such high hopes for Hannibal, but it got formulaic so quickly…
E: My point exactly. Marc…Marc are you practising old man face?
E: Don’t make me into a pot roast.
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If you’re tuning in for the first time, or you’ve forgotten where these drawings came from, check out the very first explanatory Dino Drop here.